Wednesday, March 27, 2013

rambling at its best.

Hi guys!

My blog's new! I cleaned her out, and updated the hell out of her. kinda. She is pretty now though. I just can't resist some rainbow action. Ever. I will never be able to say no to anything rainbow. This is something I have happily come to terms with.

So what's new in blog land? I haven't been here a while. I used to be so into the blog thing. I read a million of them. (I might be overexaggerating) I did blog hops, and shared my posts, and the posts of others faithfully.

For the last couple months, I've forgotten I even had a blog. Let alone 3. Yes this girl has 3. Actually, 4. This one, my poetry blog, a secret blog, and a top secret blog. Turns out I'm not an open book after all. I'm just kidding, I'm totally an open book. Ask me anything.

I just don't know what to write about. hmmm. Embrace mommy blog land and talk about my kids? Share with you the trials and triumphs of motherhood? That seems boring to me. Motherhood is not boring by any means. But it's just the same chaos. The battle to get to school on time, homework, sassyness, anger issues, temper tantrums, ratting each other out. Figuring out what kid hang with which dad when and where and how. Having 2 baby daddy's has always kept the chaos level to a maximum. Don't get me wrong, I love both daddies a lot. I don't know what I'd do without either of them. I consider both high on the best friend list. Which is a nice fact on it's own. I've been down the not getting along with the person you've made a baby with road, and I'll take this current love and understanding road over that other one anyday. Ok that seems to have covered that.

My sister lives with me now. I love having her here. I'll be sad when she decides to move on to other things.

I'm on this making my house and backyard pretty kick. This must mean I'm growing up. I'm ok with that. My addiction to pinterest is always inspiring me in some way to do something else in my house. Pinterest rocks. One day my house will too.

I went back to church. I'm loving it. I have never felt as peaceful as I have since going back. If I would have realized this several years ago, maybe I wouldn't have had to spend so much money on anti depressants. Just kidding. All that hard stuff made me who I am today, and I am pretty ok with me.

I think that's all the rambling I got for ya today. I have to go wrangle my two punks and toss em into bed.

See? Daily Motherhood Chaos.

Leave me some super thoughtful comments, k? I love when you guys do that.


Saturday, October 20, 2012

I had no idea.

Do you know what happens when you have the internet but no computer? You blog at your moms house.

My kids are currently waiting for me to get my stuff together so we can go home, so this will just be short.

Life. oh boy. She's exhausting. The man moved out. That's been hard. Heartbreak is hard enough without the mom aspect, but I've got that goin on too and I am exhausted. When my son was born, I was already single, so single motherhood was hard, yes, but that's all I knew. Fast forward a few years later, to the man living with me and helping me with the whole kid thing. Now fast forward a few more years to him being gone. And to me doing it on my own. I had NO idea it was as hard as it was. And I've done it on my own for a few years in between. I have moments where I want to hide in my room and scream. I don't know how I rocked it before.
I guess I'll figure it out. Have no choice really.

I have a new crush. On Iron Man. That might seem trivial, but I'm just thinking about how I'm totally watching Iron Man tonight because I love him.

And now I am out, as the children are on my case to go home.

Til next time!

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

On the down.

Hey guys! I'm blogging! How exciting is that?

I've been on the down and out lately with my cable (internet) provider, and I don't like blogging my phone. But I'm at a gf's place and so excited to be typing real keys on a real keyboard! (no offense, iphone, I truly love you)

I should be back officially in a month or so. If all goes according to budget anyways. You know how that goes. Shit happens.

And boy does it happen. Life is not my favorite today. Bronchitis sucks. Children suck. Grumpy men suck. PMS sucks. Quitting smoking sucks. Being broke sucks.
So bring on the chocolate and sushi. You betcha

(ok, I just deleted 4 paragraphs twice. I am now wearing my annoyed face. Attempt #3)

I have a life plan! It's very exciting! For a while I haven't known where I'm going, or how I'm going to get there or any of that. Just floating around. Work, mommy, sleep. Blah, blah blah.
But now I have a plan! Yay! I will tell you all about it when the finer details have been worked out. That may take a little bit, but don't you worry. You will be very excited for me when I have the chance to tell you!

I went to a psychic! For the first time! I have always wanted to go to one, but never have on account of fear. Life was pretty scary most of the time, and I absolutely didn't want to know what was coming. Lately though, life's been pretty alright, so I decided it's time to go! And she was amazing. Told me everything I've ever wanted to know from a psychic and I didn't have to say a word. Amazing. I left her trailer and felt so good. Like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. All I could do for half an hour after was giggle. It was awesome.

hmmm, what else can I tell you. The weight loss thing hasn't been going good for me. My fault really, as I haven't been paying as good as attention to what I'm eating. I'm just kinda eating. Feeling fairly crappy about my appearance again though, so time for that to stop. Back on calorie counting she goes!

I miss tv. I haven't had tv in over a month. I'm a tv junkie. I need it back before my shows come back on. Greys, and The New Girl, and NCIS and 90210 and Private Practice and so many more I can't even think of all of them. I miss tv.

The doc hooked me up with Champix today. I'm anxious about it. I turn into a miserable cow when attempting no more smoking, (and there have been several attempts) so here's hoping this time's easier. And yes I know, I don't deserve easy. I'm stupid for smoking. blah blah I know. It's just that I'm crazy enough without the added help. Ask the children. Ask the man. They'll tell ya.

Seriously. Crazy enough.

Well that'll be that for now. I'll hopefully see you all when I'm back in a month! (cross your fingers my budget goes accordingly this month, I miss tv) Leave me lots of comments k? I haven't had any in a while. =)


Sunday, April 29, 2012

10 irrational wishes

As it normally goes, I was cruisin through twitter and found a blog post I loved. 10 irrational wishes. It is exactly what I need right now so here are mine. 1) I wish my children, specifically the boy, wouldn't take 20 minutes every damn morning to put his socks on. Guess what kid? Nobody likes socks. Guess what else? I don't care if they have bumpy's. Shut up and put your damn socks on. 2) I wish the laundry would put itself away. The washing, drying, and folding is fine. Just put yourself away already. 3) I wish love was easier. 4) I wish I was paid more. I love my job and will never leave but a little more money would be nice. Or a lot, whatever. 5) I wish my kids didn't leave a destruction path everywhere they went in my house. I have real things to do. 6) I wish the neck and hemline of the dress I'm currently making would just cooperate. 7) I wish I only had to say things once. 8) I wish that pink fluffy monster backpack I scored from my kickass job would work as a purse. 9) I wish I could justify buying that purse I loved from the store I love. Haven't been able to yet. Still workin on the internal debate. 10) I wish during the quitting smoking battle, I didn't want to kill everyone around me. There we have it. Join in on the fun won't ya? xo, Lizzy (don't mind the format of this post, first time I've blogged from my iPhone and I haven't figured it completely out yet, I will also put the link to the original post when I figure out how)

Monday, April 23, 2012

Where'd my baby go?

My son is not a baby anymore. In fact, he's not even a little kid. He's turning into a big kid. I don't know how to deal. We used to have a super close relationship. For a while he was all I had. I had even come to terms with the idea that it was going to be me and him for the rest of my life, and I was cool with that. As life had it, our family dynamic changed. He now has a sister, and step dad of sorts. And it's not just me and him. Me and the lil man I love so much. The lil man that got me through some really tough shit. The lil man that taught me perserverance.
He's always had his dad around, and lately he's been spending a lot more time over there. Which is good for him. It makes me happy for him that he can have a good relationship with his dad and his brothers. I didn't like sharing my child, it was something that took a bit for me to get used to, but now that we've conquered that, life on those fronts is good.
My dilemma is that my lil man and I just aren't as close as we used to be. Now that he's in school, and spends more time with his dad and brothers, I have felt our relationship slip. I don't like it. We don't have as much time together as we used to and I'm having a hard time adjusting to that. I don't want to adjust to that. I spend a ton of time with my daughter. My man is a busy guy, and with my son at his dads as much as he is, it's quite often me and her. I have a lot of fun with my girly, but I miss my son.
He's getting quite the attitude with me, and he's usually getting mad at me about something, and I'm having a hard time with it. I know kids get more independent as they get older, and that's cool, I just don't like feeling we don't have a close relationship these days. Just tonight, he told me I didn't need to tuck him in anymore. Too bad for you kid, I'll be tucking you in as long as I possibly can.
I gotta find a way for us to get a little bit closer..


Sunday, April 22, 2012

Project Garden!

For a while now, I've been curious about the world of gardening. It seems very intriguing to me to plants seeds, water em, and get a bunch of vegetables. I love playing outside, and in the dirt, and seeing how this is the year I don't put off something I want to do, I'm going at it!

I rent, and the soil in my backyard sucks for gardening so I'm trying a pallet garden. My girlfriend told me about them, and we fortunately had some at work, so in the back of my mans truck they went! So far I have the pallets down in a sunny yet shady spot in my backyard, and in a few days I plan on putting plastic under the soil and then I'm onto to seeding fun! Or should I say *sowing. I should get the lingo down I suppose.

*I currently find it very humorous that I sew and sow. haha

I will post some pictures when I have some!

xo, Lizzy

Friday, February 17, 2012

Bottles of fabric dye? Meet a dress I made.

My blog posts are rare. Unlike my crafty adventures. At the beginning of the year, I decided this was the year I wasn't going to hold back on all the crafty stuff I wanna do. I'm always saying "yeah, I'm gonna do that, eventually" and then I never actually do it. So far this year, it's all good, I finished my first cross stitching project, (which is still waiting for a frame) and I got me a bunch of crochet hooks, and last night I finished my most recent project! I dyed a dress! I dyed a dress that I made!

I used gauze for the dress, broadcloth for the lining, cotton thread and Dylon dyes. I used pattern Burda 7373. I've had a crush on this pattern for a while, and it was an easy decision to make when decided which dress I wanted to dye.

Before being colored! I put dye (pink, purple, and green) in spray bottles and had some fun!

The finished product! I sprayed it twice. It was a bit too light for my liking after dying it the first time. I would like it to be brighter still, but its all good. It's very summery. I'm excited to wear it!
First things first though, I gotta hang this beauty at work for a month!!